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I've noticed a pattern emerging in recent years with the menfolk of Great Britain. After all, you get to a certain age and the options are limited to a) whatever weird friends of friends are left, b) stumbling around nightclubs and demanding to see an id before you even swap names lest your potential conquest be studying for their A-levels, or c) internet dating.

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But, no, it turns out to be a result of a phenomenon known as “day gaming” – the art of picking up unsuspecting girls in the middle of the day, usually in a public place. You're beautiful.” He blurts out the last bit as if expecting to be slapped across the face with a wet haddock. I think it would be glorious to live in a world where you could feel free to amble up to someone you liked the look of and get chatting.

The reason day gaming has come to my attention is that I've had the same experience time and again. The kind of sweaty that suggests he has just performed some kind of demanding physical exercise, before being told to dismantle a bomb in 60 seconds while someone stands over him shrieking “WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE”. I assume this darting-eyed stranger is about to either mug me or spin me a story about needing money to get home to his dying brother in Preston, and I don't want to encourage either of these things. “Er, look, I don't normally do this, but …” I am going to mug you now? But – and this is a big but – there are any number of ways you can comprehensively balls it up.

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