Fact: Babies as young as six months whose fathers are present and active in the home score higher on mental development tests than babies whose fathers are not present and active. Meg Meeker, a pediatrician, uses these facts and more to make the case that few things matter more to a girl’s mental, physical and social development than her relationship with her father.
Fact: Teenage girls who are close to their fathers are far less likely to become sexually active. Drawing on her 20-plus years of counseling teenage girls, she outlines what a father can do to strengthen or heal his relationship with his daughter and help her become a mature, healthy woman.
With his permission and the assent of the young woman, a wedding would be planned.
Honestly, this courtship process sounds like the “Dad’s against Daughters Dating” crew’s wet-dream.
OSV: In your book you stress the importance of fathers talking with their daughters about sex and about God -- two of the toughest topics for most dads to raise with their girls. Those messages can be communicated simply by sharing his thoughts on what he thinks is good, by saying things like, “It’s really important that you're not sexually active until you're married,” or “Boy, it’s beautiful when a woman waits.” That’s what a daughter wants to hear.
Use simple language and ask very open-ended questions.
I’ve heard that “joke” made in person too, this “joke” that any father with a daughter of dating age needs to have a good shotgun. Several months ago a picture of this shirt went around facebook: Much to my relief, someone finally made a counter-meme: I’m sick and tired of living in a culture that not only displays a profound distrust of young women and a strong need to control young women’s sexuality but is also incredibly flippant about the use of gun violence against other males.
Is it that hard to empower young women to make their own choices and give them the tools they need to back those choices up?And maybe that’s why seeing that hat bothered me like it did—because I’ve been there. This speaks not only to the need to control female sexuality but also to the prevalence of gun violence in our society.I know what it’s like to have a father who thinks it’s his right to have complete control over his daughter’s romantic relationships, even after she reaches adulthood. Unfortunately, googling “Dads against Daughters Dating” in preparation for this post took me down a very disturbing rabbit trail. You may have seen a TV show where the first thing a man says when he finds out he’s having a daughter is “I better get a gun.” I know I have.If a dad is uncomfortable asking what his daughter thinks about sex or religion or anything else for that matter, then he should ask what her friends think or what her friends are doing.That will give him an idea of what his daughter is up to.If dad backs out, she’ll get what she needs from male friendships or from romantic sexual relationships. 1 influence on a girl's self-esteem is affection from her dad.