Expectations are everything When I first got involved with Charles, he outlined the small print. With my expectations managed, I didn’t run into brick walls trying to make the relationship something it wasn’t. Friendship, support, great sex, an emotional connection, but not “love.”In my new relationship, the scope of my expectations is wider and deeper, but one thing I know will never happen is living in the same place.We live in different countries, and neither of us wants to move, so I’ve accepted that.
Trust is more than just monogamy Trust is knowing someone will come back, not believing they will never leave.Small children who regularly see their parents going out and returning are more secure than those who aren’t used to being left alone.Others did not, but I still assumed they were at risk whenever a thinner, younger, more attractive, different woman was around.Dating Charles meant I had to reconcile myself to being one of many, but I also discovered that did nothing to lessen my appeal.Talking through problems will solve the other half. If either of us were feeling insecure we talked it through.
Charles and I never argued, because nothing ever got to the point where it bred resentment. If, and I really mean when, you or your partner starts feeling attracted to someone else, creating a safe space to talk about it takes away much of the threat.4.
You can trust that choice more than if you never let them explore admiration from others.3.
The only way to have complete trust is to talk about everything Communication before you have problems will head off half of them.
But someone who’s unhappy and resentful, bored or not getting their needs met will leave you one day regardless of whether your relationship is monogamous or polyamorous.5.
Your partner is not enough In a poly relationship, other partners can be a source of happiness, self-esteem and satisfaction.
It came as no surprise to me, either, that I met The One while I was involved with Charles.